Drawing Bored

Let me preface this by saying I can't draw at all unless it is a profile picture of Justin with his big butt.  

Last night and this morning was filled with cramming for my organic evolution exam today. I was quite brain dead when it was over. I had to stay after my exam to attend immunology class which I kind of hate right now since I poked myself in the eye because of it. Anyway I was super bored during lecture because I had zero brain power left. So I drew some Harry Potter characters. 

I had to crop part of the dementor out because blogger would not let me post the photo upright so I had to resize it.

And then I drew Warty the Robert De Niro-esque Warthog. I just thought I would share to prove that I was somewhat productive today… perhaps not in the proper way but in my defense my butt hurts.

This looks exactly like Rober De Niro to me...

PS In an effort to preserve the legs of future dementors; if you can't get a photo to rotate in Blogger open the image in paint and save it as a .PNG instead of the .JPEG thing and you will be good to go.

Breaking Butts

So I'm writing this from my phone because my ass hurts, and I can't get up. I feel it is my duty to warn people about this so called "squat challenge." I decided this seemed like a good idea because cottage cheese (enough said). Essentially it is an exercise program to tone buns and thighs. "You will have such a great ass," they say... No. A dysfunctional ass more like it. 

The exercise series commences with 50 squats. Each day that passes thereafter you add five additional squats. Every fifth day is a rest day. By the end of the month you will have worked your way up to 200 something squats. 

Today was day one for me. I did my 50 squats. The first 25 or so were okay. I held each squat for about ten to fifteen seconds because that is what we do in yoga. The difference is that in yoga we do like three here I did 50. By number 30 my legs were shaking uncontrollably but I suffered through with my ten second holding for every last one of those fifty. 

Unfortunately I decided to complete these squats directly before my biochemistry class. I tripped trying to get in and out of my truck. My legs nearly gave way on the stairwell so I was forced to clutch the railing the whole way down. I'm still not 100% from my eye injury so I basically walked to class winking uncontrollably and having my knees give way every few steps. 

Luckily I somehow made it to class where I tried my hardest not to move throughout its entirety. I then walked back to my truck in the dark without falling once. I am home now. I am anxious to see how tomorrow compares. Worst case I will have Justin call in sick to work, fashion myself a rickshaw, and have him run me around campus all day in it. Win-Win. 

Eye Matey

One of the courses I am taking this semester is immunology. It is taught by a professor with a thick French accent. In the French alphabet the vowels are similar to ours. 'I' is referred to as 'E' when enunciating the letter. When I was studying diligently for my immunology quiz this morning I kept noticing how every time there was a molecule that had the letter 'I' in it I was mentally reading it as E. Instead of IgG and IgM I was saying EgG and EgM.

"I you fool, I..." I kept saying to myself. "I like your eyeball."

Then I paper cut my eye. I am not kidding. I was like...

Photo Credit: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sauron

And I had a melt down, all the while making a mental note that I understood why Sauron was so angry all the time. His eye was on fire! Suddenly it all makes sense.

After sobbing like a bitch I tried to check things out in the mirror. I thought I saw a cut in it, but have been unable to locate it since because it has either healed itself because it was so minor, or because it was never there in the first place.

Currently it just feels like I have a grain of sand in my eye. I hope things get better by tomorrow otherwise I may have to take a trip to the optometrist. This may of course lead to an eye patch which honestly won't be so bad because I can say that I was throwing my eye in front of a runaway train to save a child's life, or that I donated it to my blind cat so it could finally see what its selfless master (i.e. me) looked like. Then of course there is the other option of walking around with a fake hook hand and yelling "shiver me timbers," and "aye matey!" The possibilities are endless really. I shall keep you updated.

In other news I found this photo online the other day and I think it is very relevant to my life. 

Photo Credit: http://uncommonpics.com/pic-1121-The-missing-puzzle-cat

Making New Friends

I got home from volunteering this afternoon to find a familiar furry face outside of my apartment complex. I have been trying to coerce a particular cat to let me pet it since Justin and I discovered her a few weeks ago. Today... Victory was mine.

I petted the cat for a good ten or fifteen minutes then walked to my apartment (clear across the complex) I was about to unlock my front door when someone behind me meowed. I turned to see that I had been followed.

Hello, new friend

I sat down on our chair outside our door and soon company joined me.

BFFs just look at that face

I eventually had to go inside because I had a bunch of stuff I had carried in from my truck. I set everything down and could hear my friend meowing outside the door. I made some sourdough toast (pretty much the only food I had in the house aside from potatoes and cupcakes) in hopes to provide a snack for my guest. I went back outside and unfortunately there were no pointy ears anywhere to be seen.

I traipsed around the complex a few times, sourdough toast in hand, looking for my new pet but alas she was no where to be found. I had to eventually retire to my unit since I was afraid neighborhood watch might suspect me to be a rogue cat-napper or straight up psychotic person..

Anyway she was lacking a collar and looked a little dirty so I am not sure if she is someone's pet or what. Next time I see her, I may or may not kidnap her because how could I not???


Edit: So apparently in Pennsylvania there is this cat shelter that lets kids voluntarily come in to read to the cats. I am pretty sure I died like six times while reading about the whole situation.

http://www.today.com/pets/purrs-not-frowns-kids-feel-comfortable-reading-aloud-shelter-cats-2D12103268

Above Photo credit (click on links to read more): http://www.buzzfeed.com/erinchack/kids-read-to-sheltered-cats-and-everyones-heart-collectively

Love Love Love

Valentine's Day has come and gone. If there is one thing I learned it is never to make an agreement with Justin to not get each other anything on Valentine's Day or any other holiday for that matter.

On Valentine's eve I could not sleep so I sang my rendition of "The Circle of Life," Broadway style... A gift to Justin beyond any price indeed. I awoke in the morning to a gift and card. By 2:00PM two dozen roses were delivered. When Justin arrived home from work he had four vegan cupcakes in hand. I felt like a complete ass since my windshield wipers didn't work and essentially venturing out in my vehicle during the buckets of rain that were pouring down was asking for trouble.

I did make it down the street to Whole Foods (before he arrived home from work) and purchased some gourmet chocolates and cupcakes... Now we have six cupcakes, whatever shall we do??? Eat them all, duh. I also cooked our favorite lasagna and stuffed mushrooms. We ate nearly the entire pan of lasagna and all of the mushrooms.

We spent the evening just relaxing with bellies full of goodness (and guilt in my case... I will never be fooled again).

I also got to talk to my Uncle who sent me a rare edition of The Lord of the Rings trilogy in the mail. One of my favorite pastimes from childhood was reading those books with him. The books were a priceless gift indeed.

My kind of Valentine... Photo Credit: http://www.lordofthememe.com/Lord+Of+The+Rings+Funny+Pics/Will-you-be-my-LOTR-valentine/163

Also one of my dearest friends got engaged. She is most deserving, and I could go on for hours really about how excited I am that she is getting married... It is kind of like I am getting married ha. So now I must start searching for my wedding attire for her special day, I am thinking something along these lines.

Photo Credit: http://www.allweddingsecrets.com/princess-wedding-dresses/

Oh wait, I can't wear white to her wedding... how foolish of me I think I will go with something more along these lines.

Photo Credit: http://www.genesisxllc.com/images/dress_Perfect_Ball_Gown_Floor_Length_Sweatheart_Hot_Pink_Pd1124_Beads_And_Sequins_Prom_Dress_Sale.jpg

No?? Fine I will start scouting for some pantsuits.I mean I can't go wrong there, especially if I can get my mitts on a trendy cell phone.

In all seriousness I am truly ecstatic for her big day. True love is a rarity and solidifying something that special with marriage vows is spectacular in my opinion. Speaking of which, another great friend of mine will be tying the knot soon.... If you are feeling generous click the link to check out his story.

Trucking Electronics

On Monday this week temperatures reached the fifties. I basked in the glory of the sun’s magnificence after volunteering. There was a faint hint of the smell of spring in the air. As it turns out Mother Nature was playing a cruel, cruel trick on me because it has been drizzly and gray ever since. 

My truck hates when it rains. It was rolled at one point in its life so the windshield does not properly fit in the frame of the truck; despite it being the correct model. The rain gets down into the boggered seal and plays with all of the electrical wires. Once everything is fully saturated the real fun beings; the windows randomly roll up and down of their own accord, the radio turns on and off even when the volume button is pressed in (the off position), it flips through all the radio stations at a random pace, it flashes dash lights, switches into 4x4, locks me in, etc. This all happens regardless of whether the truck is actually on or off. Sometimes when I walk up to my truck it greets me by suddenly blasting the radio or rolling the windows down as if to say, “enter at your own risk,” or “how dare you leave me in the rain… payback is a bitch.”

The last couple of days I have commuted to and from school with a white knuckle grip on the steering wheel awaiting my trucks next move. The damn thing doesn’t like to switch out of first gear, so I drive down the street going like 20mph and revving at 300-350RPM. I watch as all of the angry drivers give me looks of hate and zoom past me. Sometimes, when I least expect it the damn truck takes off like a rocket and bangs loudly as it kicks into gear and lurches my truck forward. I swear the front two tires lift off the floor when it does that, like I am riding some kind of bucking bronco or whatever those damn horses are called…

Anyway I kept thinking about this scene in “Elf” today when I was driving…

Same exact situation, only he is not in imminent danger *sigh.

 

E is for Eeyore and F is for Failure....

Do you ever have one of those days where you feel like this?

Also I googled "Eeyore" received the above image as well as this result...

That actually is a more accurate description of how I feel.

Then there was this one...

Well played Google, you actually made me feel a bit better.

I have been studying my ass off for hours on end for my biochemistry exam tonight. We shall see how it all goes. If nothing else perhaps I could pen one of the above Eeyore images on to my exam sheet in hopes of scaring my professor into giving me an 'A.'