I checked in this patient today and she had two emergency contacts. This is not uncommon. I focused my eyes over each name and said; "okay so you have Dick and Dick for an emergency contact? So two dicks?" Then I felt myself turn red. The patient paused for a totally inappropriate time frame (I think I don't know I'm pretty hypervilligent these days so it may have only been a fraction of a second).
Patient: uhhh?
Me: let me see oh yes they are two different Dicks. It says one is your father and one is your spouse?
Patient: yes that's right
Me: okay awesome
Then I continued about my business trying not to act like a 12 year old because I could not contain the hilarity of having not one but two dicks as emergency contacts. End.
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