Thursday, February 27, 2014

Just Another Boring Thursday

Thursday's are my long day for classes this semester. I spent the morning trying to find out about fostering cats. Since I have been trying to steal all of the neighborhood cats Justin has shown more interest in our obtaining one legally. We were planning to wait until we purchase a house but all the signs are pointing to doing something now before I wind up in jail for cat napping. Since we are still in our little one bedroom apartment we are leaning towards fostering as opposed to straight out adopting a cat for the time being. But we shall see; my land lord has to cooperate first.So keep your fingers crossed, or your paws.

Photo Credit: http://i.imgur.com/3Pnxz4J.jpg


In other news I went to my afternoon classes, and then prepared for my evening lab. I sat down at a table on a nearly vacant floor in one of the buildings on campus. The table I selected was right next to a table with a leather jacket slung over the back of the chair, seemingly with no owner in sight. I then noticed a girl writing something while leaning on a trash bin. I noticed every time someone walked by the chair with the jacket slung over it they would look over at it and walk away in confusion. The girl would rubber neck at the confused passerbys then frantically scribble on her paper. Didn't take long to determine that she was conducting some kind of asshole experiment. I thought momentarily about getting up and putting the jacket to see how she would react, but I decided to be nice.

Anyway then I plugged my earphones into my iPhone and started listening to this song which is my new favorite.


I decided to waste an ounce more time before preparing my pre-lab for my evening class by checking my email. Then I saw for the first time EVER out of the approximate 15 or so labs (amounting to 200+ class sessions) I have taken during college that class was cancelled! I was like...

http://newmediarockstars.com/2013/08/redditors-photo-of-cats-hilarious-smiling-face-raises-nearly-1000-for-animal-shelters/

Just goes to show that wasting time can be beneficial every once in a while.
I immediately packed up, grabbed Justin and myself some coffee, and skipped all the way home. When I got there I started some vegan crock-pot chilli. Coffee+Boyfriend+Chilli=a perfect end to a cloudy/rainy day

Wednesday, February 26, 2014

The Muffin Man and his Apple Tree



Do you know the muffin man?? I do. I was temporarily him in a haze today. I am super stressed regarding an exam tonight so naturally I did what Malina does best in preparation for exams; everything but study. I made a dozen lemon blueberry muffins, than I ate half of said dozen. At least that is what I am telling myself. I think I only ate four but I am too afraid to look and must give myself a buffer in the event that Justin reads this blog. Buffer…now there is something that is related to my chemistry test. 

The past few days I have had an exceptionally strong sweet tooth, or at least more so than usual. Justin attempted to quash these cravings with a couple of boxes of animal crackers. I know that in being vegan eating animal crackers is like this weird oxymoron type scenario, but they are delicious. And I like to bite the heads off especially when I am feeling evil. Regardless of the fun that was had whilst devouring two boxes of animal shaped cookies it just didn’t quite hit the spot. So here I am in a pile of muffin wrappers, trying as I might to ignore the remaining supply just two feet away from me in the kitchen.   
Photo Credit: Barnum's Animal Crackers



I must admit these cookies do bring the memories back from childhood. I spent my early years on 14+ acres in rural New Hampshire. I fondly remember carrying the above cookies around as I explored our property which was primarily woods. Ahh the joys. Then there was that weird time when my parents made my sister read to me under the shade of our apple tree. They filmed the experience and somewhere there exists the idea that was supposed to be very proper children enjoying each other's company but in its stead is me picking my nose and wiping it on my sister continually while she read away none the wiser... Alright enough reminiscing test in T-45 minutes.

Tuesday, February 25, 2014

30 Days of Squats and Toast

So I have had a few people ask me about this 30 day squat challenge business that I am doing despite my butt feeling like it is going to fall off. Here is a chart of the mechanism I have instituted for a toned ass.. We shall see. All I can verify thus far is that you will have to talk to your ass with an aggressive tone in order to force it to cooperate.

Photo Credit:http://30dayfitnesschallenges.com/30-day-squat-challenge/#_

Anyway, back to business here. So the method I use to do this nonsense is as follows. Step one see how many squats you are supposed to do and divide it by three. If you end up with a number that isn't perfectly divisible that is fantastic because you can round up or down depending on your mood. Step two, get some butter (or Earth Balance in my case) and put it by the toaster. Step three go face the toaster with bread in hand. Do your first set of squats. When you are done put the toast in the toaster and do your second set whilst smelling the decadent aroma emanating from the hot box. Take a tick of rest and try to finish your last set before the toast pops. If you fail it will only make you pump it harder to finish the last set anyway.

I must add also that this blog is not, nor will it ever be a fitness blog. I feel there are more important things in life than looking all sexy. For example; cake decorating, watching Harry Potter and running around after Justin when he gets home from work to try to spank his apple bottom. All though I suppose that is a catch 22 because I am pretty sure all of the aforementioned items have a degree of sexiness involved with them.


Monday, February 24, 2014

Fishing for Mondays (edited like 100 times)

Today is Monday so I got to volunteer at the hospital. I finished my shift and grabbed an iced grande soy vanilla hazelnut latte (yes it is a mouthful but in a delicious way). When I arrived home I walked into the bedroom pausing at the bed noting how I needed to do a load of laundry but not the blankets because Justin would be doing that this weekend. Then I dumped my coffee all over the bed. I was like "yay," except not really.

Next was lunch. I grabbed for my Whole Foods box of tofu and bok choy. I had a funny feeling before I delved in and glanced once more at the ingredients. It had bonito extract... bonito is a fish. Why on earth tofu would be seasoned with fish is beyond me. I am so thankful that I did not have any of it in my mouth before the discovery was made. Also I think bonito in Spanish means nice, so basically people are all chopping up nice fishes and eating them.

Photo Credit: Disney

I think I found Nemo...Photo Credit: http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/image/nemo
Okay Okay enough of the vegan propaganda (but fun fact did you know that Nemo means "no one" in Latin? I wonder if Pixar intentionally picked that character name?)

After the nice fish issue I started to cook dinner; vegan burritos. I excitedly grabbed the new jar of industrial sized salsa and use my manly muscles to rip the top off. I exerted such a force that I dumped about an eighth of the jar down my white shirt. When I walked into the bathroom my reflection in the mirror looked as though I had been shot in the heart. I considered for a few moments staging a crime scene since Justin would be arriving home from work soon. I could lie on the floor and perhaps leave the door open a crack, to make it appear as though an intruder was still in the apartment. Then I figured that Justin would probably just eat my shirt because he loves salsa so I decided I had better try to get the stain out.

*edit- this posted really weird and deleted like half my blog but I think I have everything the way I want it now. 

Sunday, February 23, 2014

Writing Between the Lines of Friendship



"The only reward of virtue is virtue; the only way to have a friend is to be one." - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Throughout the years I have always bombarded friends and family with handwritten letters. I write not because expect anything back, but just as my little way to reach out and say hello. Honestly it is a rarity to receive a response, but when I do it is most welcome. Today I received a card from a very dear friend who I haven’t written to in ages. It was a nice reminder to know that someone was thinking of me.

Life is funny in the way that it pulls us apart. Nevertheless I am so fortunate to have the thriving, quality friendships and family that I do. Sometimes I can’t help but to feel selfish in a way because of my busy schedule; full time and a half student, the 20 + hours of homework per week that entails, my volunteer job, my real job, and the everyday duties that are life. But let me not act like a martyr because I am truly thankful for all of the opportunities that my humble little life has afforded me.

I guess what I am trying to say is; I appreciate those who respect my life and the capacity to which I live it. I appreciate those who take the time to reach out to me once in a while, and who do not live on the notion that friendship is a one way street. I appreciate those who allow me to maintain healthy/positive friendships with them, I appreciate those who do not continuously turn the spotlight on themselves and bask in the oxymoron of darkness that exists in doing so. I appreciate those who are capable of celebrating other people’s victories and milestones in life. Life is a beautiful compilation of brilliant people and spectacular adventures. But above all it is what we make of it, and the outlook we have towards it.

Be not mistaken, dear readership this is not meant to be a negative post. This is a roundabout way of saying thank you to those who truly, genuinely are quality wholesome friends. As I mentioned above I am blessed with some amazing friendships. 

In other news I have been looking for a reason to post the following two photos (which I discovered on Reddit like a month ago). Maybe this borderline weird-o post is just the excuse to do so. 

Friday, February 21, 2014

Exam Insurance- (they really need to invent that)

6:00pm-ish
Me: "We need to get prepared for the six month insurance premium that is coming due."
Justin: "Okay."
Me: "We have like a month but I need to call the insurance agent."
Justin: "Ya definitely."

9:45pm-ish (after an intense five minutes of running around the house spanking each other in a non-sexual way) 

Justin: "You know what I was thinking about today?"
Me: "No, what?"
Justin: "Our six month insurance must be coming due again soon."
Me:"..."

In other news I have not one, but two exams tomorrow. First one is at 8:00am. Here is a screen shot of my alarm clock. Gotta set it for every hour in case I fall asleep while cramming in the morning. In other words here is a reason to smile to yourself and know your Saturday might be slightly better than mine :)


Thursday, February 20, 2014

Drawing Bored



Let me preface this by saying I can't draw at all unless it is a profile picture of Justin with his big butt.  

Last night and this morning was filled with cramming for my organic evolution exam today. I was quite brain dead when it was over. I had to stay after my exam to attend immunology class which I kind of hate right now since I poked myself in the eye because of it. Anyway I was super bored during lecture because I had zero brain power left. So I drew some Harry Potter characters. 
I had to crop part of the dementor out because blogger would not let me post the photo upright so I had to resize it.


And then I drew Warty the Robert De Niro-esque Warthog. I just thought I would share to prove that I was somewhat productive today… perhaps not in the proper way but in my defense my butt hurts.
This looks exactly like Rober De Niro to me...
PS In an effort to preserve the legs of future dementors; if you can't get a photo to rotate in Blogger open the image in paint and save it as a .PNG instead of the .JPEG thing and you will be good to go.

Wednesday, February 19, 2014

Breaking Butts

So I'm writing this from my phone because my ass hurts, and I can't get up. I feel it is my duty to warn people about this so called "squat challenge." I decided this seemed like a good idea because cottage cheese (enough said). Essentially it is an exercise program to tone buns and thighs. "You will have such a great ass," they say... No. A dysfunctional ass more like it. 

The exercise series commences with 50 squats. Each day that passes thereafter you add five additional squats. Every fifth day is a rest day. By the end of the month you will have worked your way up to 200 something squats. 

Today was day one for me. I did my 50 squats. The first 25 or so were okay. I held each squat for about ten to fifteen seconds because that is what we do in yoga. The difference is that in yoga we do like three here I did 50. By number 30 my legs were shaking uncontrollably but I suffered through with my ten second holding for every last one of those fifty. 

Unfortunately I decided to complete these squats directly before my biochemistry class. I tripped trying to get in and out of my truck. My legs nearly gave way on the stairwell so I was forced to clutch the railing the whole way down. I'm still not 100% from my eye injury so I basically walked to class winking uncontrollably and having my knees give way every few steps. 

Luckily I somehow made it to class where I tried my hardest not to move throughout its entirety. I then walked back to my truck in the dark without falling once. I am home now. I am anxious to see how tomorrow compares. Worst case I will have Justin call in sick to work, fashion myself a rickshaw, and have him run me around campus all day in it. Win-Win. 

Tuesday, February 18, 2014

Eye Matey

One of the courses I am taking this semester is immunology. It is taught by a professor with a thick French accent. In the French alphabet the vowels are similar to ours. 'I' is referred to as 'E' when enunciating the letter. When I was studying diligently for my immunology quiz this morning I kept noticing how every time there was a molecule that had the letter 'I' in it I was mentally reading it as E. Instead of IgG and IgM I was saying EgG and EgM.

"I you fool, I..." I kept saying to myself. "I like your eyeball."

Then I paper cut my eye. I am not kidding. I was like...

Photo Credit: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sauron


And I had a melt down, all the while making a mental note that I understood why Sauron was so angry all the time. His eye was on fire! Suddenly it all makes sense.

After sobbing like a bitch I tried to check things out in the mirror. I thought I saw a cut in it, but have been unable to locate it since because it has either healed itself because it was so minor, or because it was never there in the first place.

Currently it just feels like I have a grain of sand in my eye. I hope things get better by tomorrow otherwise I may have to take a trip to the optometrist. This may of course lead to an eye patch which honestly won't be so bad because I can say that I was throwing my eye in front of a runaway train to save a child's life, or that I donated it to my blind cat so it could finally see what its selfless master (i.e. me) looked like. Then of course there is the other option of walking around with a fake hook hand and yelling "shiver me timbers," and "aye matey!" The possibilities are endless really. I shall keep you updated.

In other news I found this photo online the other day and I think it is very relevant to my life. 
Photo Credit: http://uncommonpics.com/pic-1121-The-missing-puzzle-cat

Monday, February 17, 2014

Making New Friends

I got home from volunteering this afternoon to find a familiar furry face outside of my apartment complex. I have been trying to coerce a particular cat to let me pet it since Justin and I discovered her a few weeks ago. Today... Victory was mine.

I petted the cat for a good ten or fifteen minutes then walked to my apartment (clear across the complex) I was about to unlock my front door when someone behind me meowed. I turned to see that I had been followed.
Hello, new friend

I sat down on our chair outside our door and soon company joined me.
BFFs just look at that face
I eventually had to go inside because I had a bunch of stuff I had carried in from my truck. I set everything down and could hear my friend meowing outside the door. I made some sourdough toast (pretty much the only food I had in the house aside from potatoes and cupcakes) in hopes to provide a snack for my guest. I went back outside and unfortunately there were no pointy ears anywhere to be seen.

I traipsed around the complex a few times, sourdough toast in hand, looking for my new pet but alas she was no where to be found. I had to eventually retire to my unit since I was afraid neighborhood watch might suspect me to be a rogue cat-napper or straight up psychotic person..

Anyway she was lacking a collar and looked a little dirty so I am not sure if she is someone's pet or what. Next time I see her, I may or may not kidnap her because how could I not???


Edit: So apparently in Pennsylvania there is this cat shelter that lets kids voluntarily come in to read to the cats. I am pretty sure I died like six times while reading about the whole situation.

http://www.today.com/pets/purrs-not-frowns-kids-feel-comfortable-reading-aloud-shelter-cats-2D12103268

Above Photo credit (click on links to read more): http://www.buzzfeed.com/erinchack/kids-read-to-sheltered-cats-and-everyones-heart-collectively

Saturday, February 15, 2014

Love Love Love

Valentine's Day has come and gone. If there is one thing I learned it is never to make an agreement with Justin to not get each other anything on Valentine's Day or any other holiday for that matter.

On Valentine's eve I could not sleep so I sang my rendition of "The Circle of Life," Broadway style... A gift to Justin beyond any price indeed. I awoke in the morning to a gift and card. By 2:00PM two dozen roses were delivered. When Justin arrived home from work he had four vegan cupcakes in hand. I felt like a complete ass since my windshield wipers didn't work and essentially venturing out in my vehicle during the buckets of rain that were pouring down was asking for trouble.

I did make it down the street to Whole Foods (before he arrived home from work) and purchased some gourmet chocolates and cupcakes... Now we have six cupcakes, whatever shall we do??? Eat them all, duh. I also cooked our favorite lasagna and stuffed mushrooms. We ate nearly the entire pan of lasagna and all of the mushrooms.

We spent the evening just relaxing with bellies full of goodness (and guilt in my case... I will never be fooled again).

I also got to talk to my Uncle who sent me a rare edition of The Lord of the Rings trilogy in the mail. One of my favorite pastimes from childhood was reading those books with him. The books were a priceless gift indeed.
My kind of Valentine... Photo Credit: http://www.lordofthememe.com/Lord+Of+The+Rings+Funny+Pics/Will-you-be-my-LOTR-valentine/163

Also one of my dearest friends got engaged. She is most deserving, and I could go on for hours really about how excited I am that she is getting married... It is kind of like I am getting married ha. So now I must start searching for my wedding attire for her special day, I am thinking something along these lines.
Photo Credit: http://www.allweddingsecrets.com/princess-wedding-dresses/

Oh wait, I can't wear white to her wedding... how foolish of me I think I will go with something more along these lines.
Photo Credit: http://www.genesisxllc.com/images/dress_Perfect_Ball_Gown_Floor_Length_Sweatheart_Hot_Pink_Pd1124_Beads_And_Sequins_Prom_Dress_Sale.jpg
No?? Fine I will start scouting for some pantsuits.I mean I can't go wrong there, especially if I can get my mitts on a trendy cell phone.



In all seriousness I am truly ecstatic for her big day. True love is a rarity and solidifying something that special with marriage vows is spectacular in my opinion. Speaking of which, another great friend of mine will be tying the knot soon.... If you are feeling generous click the link to check out his story.

Thursday, February 13, 2014

Trucking Electronics



On Monday this week temperatures reached the fifties. I basked in the glory of the sun’s magnificence after volunteering. There was a faint hint of the smell of spring in the air. As it turns out Mother Nature was playing a cruel, cruel trick on me because it has been drizzly and gray ever since. 

My truck hates when it rains. It was rolled at one point in its life so the windshield does not properly fit in the frame of the truck; despite it being the correct model. The rain gets down into the boggered seal and plays with all of the electrical wires. Once everything is fully saturated the real fun beings; the windows randomly roll up and down of their own accord, the radio turns on and off even when the volume button is pressed in (the off position), it flips through all the radio stations at a random pace, it flashes dash lights, switches into 4x4, locks me in, etc. This all happens regardless of whether the truck is actually on or off. Sometimes when I walk up to my truck it greets me by suddenly blasting the radio or rolling the windows down as if to say, “enter at your own risk,” or “how dare you leave me in the rain… payback is a bitch.”

The last couple of days I have commuted to and from school with a white knuckle grip on the steering wheel awaiting my trucks next move. The damn thing doesn’t like to switch out of first gear, so I drive down the street going like 20mph and revving at 300-350RPM. I watch as all of the angry drivers give me looks of hate and zoom past me. Sometimes, when I least expect it the damn truck takes off like a rocket and bangs loudly as it kicks into gear and lurches my truck forward. I swear the front two tires lift off the floor when it does that, like I am riding some kind of bucking bronco or whatever those damn horses are called…

Anyway I kept thinking about this scene in “Elf” today when I was driving…


Same exact situation, only he is not in imminent danger *sigh.