Friday, October 31, 2014

Trick or Treat

Me: I just ate a whole bunch of chocolate

Jessica: Oh really?

Me: Yes but in my defense it was really good.

Jessica: What kind was it?

Me: Dark chocolate with raspberry AND orange filling

Jessica: That sounds fantastic, I could melt that down and roll around in it!

Yes... This is why we are friends.

If I ever get reincarnated as a bird this will be me Photo Credit: veryhilarious.com


In other news I found out I don't have Gonorrhea. After obtaining DNA sequencing in lab I discovered I have Kocuria rosea which is a harmless bacteria except it has been found in bacterial infections which result from medical implants or catheters. This is definitely not as exciting as gonorrhea so alas, when I give my presentation at the close of the semester I am sure I won't be as engaging as I could have been. However now my hands won't be as raw after lab since I won't be excessively washing them out of fear of transferring some gonorrhea to my lady bits.




Thursday, October 30, 2014

Creepy Findings Justin Time For Halloween



What is the technical term for a hair fetish? That is rhetorical because I just Googled it since I did not want my readers to have to do the hard work and possibly see some unsavory images whilst innocently trying to determine the answer to my question. Trichophilia; that is what Google calls it. Anyway this is what the seller of our house had. 

A few weeks back Justin’s mom decided to clean one of the guest bathrooms and discovered a drawer full of hair clippings… As in layers of hair stubble covering the bottom portion of the drawer, *shudder. I HATE hair when it is detached from the head, coming second only to spiders (toenail/fingernail clippings are third and fourth respectively for anyone that ever wants to kidnap and torture me you now have the perfect recipe…don’t forget Kevin Bacon) hair is one of the things that scares me the most. 

Fast forward to this past Sunday when I received the following text:

Justin: Hey you will never guess what I just found

Me: Oh no, what? If it is a huge spider you have to tell me!

My phone rang and I anxiously picked up preparing myself for the worst case scenario (Aragog living in our garage)
Aragog behind the scenes Photo Credit: Harry Potter

Justin: So I was cleaning out the kitchen cabinets since it was one of the only things left to do.

Me: Okay… And???

Justin: And I found something in a zip lock bag…

Me: … uh, oh? What is it?

Justin:… a fucking pony tail!

It took several moments for me to actually believe what Justin had revealed; I am still a bit shell shocked. Since the revelation we have come up with several hypotheses surrounding the circumstances of said pony tail.

1.)    The seller was in the military. Prior to enlisting he was grunge and had a ponytail which he loved to the ends of the earth. Unfortunately he was forced to sever ties with his life-long friend upon enlistment and couldn’t bear to be away from it. So alas, he had to store it in the kitchen cabinet where he could pull it out every morning during breakfast and comb it while reminiscing. 

2.)    The seller was a psychopath and murdered someone. He decided to keep a token of remembrance from his victim: her pony tail.  Possibly he was a cannibal hence leaving the ponytail in the kitchen.

3.)    The seller was in love with some forbidden person (a sister, his mom, etc) and was never allowed to act on his heart’s true desires so he kept the pony tail around to attach from time to time to get his jollies. If he couldn’t have his true love he would BE his true love. Duh.

4.)    Maybe he just wanted to donate it to locks of love and forgot to take it with him. 

We may never know the true origins of the ponytail. Now it is somewhere at the dump hopefully making friends with all the other creepy things. 

PS- If you or anyone you know has lost their beloved ponytail may I be so bold to suggest the following as a gift? You're welcome. 
ponytail hat Photo Credit: Google

Wednesday, October 29, 2014

Home Improvement

I have been on the quiet side lately with this blog because, despite the capability I have of proof-reading my own posts, I have been afraid of slipping up and sharing the news before Justin and I are ready... drum roll please.... We bought a house! After looking at dozens of homes, and not acting quick enough with offers on two prior homes, we landed us a house. Because what better thing to add to my plate during my final semester of school than moving? Of course I know that the headaches of moving this go round will be well worth it in the end.

For the past few weeks Justin and his parents have been going over on the weekends to prepare for our big move. They have scrubbed high and low, pulled weeds, stained the fence, replaced fixtures on and on and on. I can't even begin to put into words how much their help means to us. It is a rare breed who will donate their weekends to do back breaking work which involves shaving off layers of grime the seller left in the house.

I will post photos of the house when I take them with my camera phone. It is nothing too exciting, but going from an efficiency kitchen to a full kitchen with a walk-in pantry and a microwave (haven't had one of those in ages) is pretty awesome. Not to mention the fact that we have extra bedrooms and bathrooms now too, oh and let's not forget the back yard. So needless to say we are excited as can be over here. We hope to be officially moved over soon and can't wait to get settled.

Photo Credit: http://brightestyoungthings.com/articles/obytuary-jtt.htm
I am not sure why I wanted to post this photo of Jonathan Taylor Thomas but I blame the title of this blog. Let's just say Justin and I are as excited about our new house as JTT and his dog are about their matching sweaters.

Sunday, October 26, 2014

Break Me Off A Piece Of That

This weekend was a rough one. More on that later when I have some time :) I have been missing Justin tremendously lately since we have been so busy. Not a day passes that he isn't working overtime and I'm not ripping my hair out from studying so much. 

One day this week I got to snooze for an extra hour after justin had left for work which was divine. What wasn't divine was the strange dream I had about my ex boyfriend. I was stealing food from his refrigerator (he lived in a gas station in my dream and had an extensive refrigerator I might add). I kept thinking I was dating this really great guy yet I could not figure out who it was or where he was in my dream so instead I just stole food because heaven forbid I ever forget what food is. 

I kept trying to gnaw on this apple and for the life of me I could not bite off any juicy chunks. It was highly frustrating. I was trying to emotionally eat but alas my efforts were futile. Fortunately I somehow realized in my dream that I was having a dream and I awoke sucking on the corner of a wooden photo frame with a picture of Justin in it. 

So apparently my sleep antics are kicking in again. Thank goodness the frame I had is on my nightstand so I didn't have to go too far to get it, so at least I'm not sleep walking again yet. But I'm sure as the end of the semester draws nearer I'll be hosting cocktail parties, doing acrobats, and robbing cake stores. 

Mmm break me off a piece of that rock hard frame. (Ps my favorite photo ever of justin-you're welcome)

Thursday, October 23, 2014

Pushing My Buttons

You know how Staples sells those "That was easy!" buttons? I feel like there is really room to expand that market.
Photo Credit: Staples

Yesterday I had my Biology of Cancer exam. The examination was 11 essay questions. Within five minutes' time after we received our exams an individual stood up from her seat, face beet red, and handed in her exam. This rattled my confidence a bit since I knew that she had given up and not answered even one question. I pushed through and felt mediocre about the outcome.

This morning I had a microbiology exam. Microbiology for me is reminiscent of Botany however slightly less boring. Like on a one to ten scale with one being economics and ten being philosophy botany is a zero and microbiology is a three. When I am uninterested in the subject matter I struggle with studying. Alas, the exam was SO hard. That's what she said.

Anyway if I can't pass microbiology I am thinking of spring-boarding from Staples' button and making different varieties that say things like, "This is horseshit!" "I fucking hate this," and "Avada Kedavra," for good measure. Of course I will have to get J.K. Rowling's permission on that last, and ban wizards from purchasing that particular strain of button. Strain... Listen to me-UGH I sound like microbiology, gross!


Wednesday, October 22, 2014

Holy Visions

I have been studying my buns off for exams the past several days. This morning I awoke at the crack of dawn to get a few more hours of cramming in before one of my exams. I began the day by scrolling through my Facebook feed. I usually try not to do this in the morning since I get very sidetracked... But today I relented. I saw this article about awesome things in Montana and I though oh goodness I had better read this because I went to Montana one time (to massacre a deer and to attend one of my best friend's weddings) and it was pretty awesome (the wedding not the deer maiming).

I started scrolling through the photos of wondrous looking landscapes and then arrived at this photo:

Photo Credit: Wikipedia

Then I was like Sarumon the White?

Photo Credit: LOTR (Fellowship of the Ring)
Then I thought, wait no- Montana wouldn't have Sarumon up in their mountains because all Sarumon ever does is try to bring down the mountains, so it must be Gandalf the white...

Photo Credit: LOTR (Two Towers)
But then like 30 minutes later I figured out I was wrong on both counts because why on earth would there be a Gandalf in Montana on top of a mountain without at least one hobbit. Anyway I googled the photo and then realized that it was the Virgin Mary. So I guess now I know where my priorities lie.

Also it should be noted that when I searched for Gandalf the white this came up in my news feed. Yes... Yes this just speaks to me. And I would totally wear this minus the boots.
Photo Credit:http://fancy-tshirts.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/Gandalf-The-White-dress-design-from-blackmilkclothing.com-girl-585x877.jpg
Zoomed image for all those with screens that can't zoom in.

Sunday, October 19, 2014

Spirit Expeditions of Boise



I would like to take a moment to say Spirit Expeditions of Boise is horrible. I don’t normally share my disdain for companies, but I feel it is necessary in this instance. Justin’s parents have been overly helpful to us recently.  Though there really is nothing that can properly convey our gratitude I, in my normal deluded self, thought an excursion/tour through downtown Boise visiting all of the haunted places would be a way to partially/minutely say thank you. Because what normal person doesn’t say thank you via haunted tours which explain the history of notorious serial killers and murder locations?

We excitedly arrived outside of the Egyptian theater and awaited our tour guide (as directed) for several minutes. A few minutes into our waiting I did as the email advised and called the emergency number since our tour guide was nowhere to be seen. After a lengthy recorded message advised me to leave a voice mail, and that someone would call us back, a second voice came on the line informing me that the mailbox was full. Each time I called back the phone never rang-allegedly because they were so busy-and I continually reached the recorded message. 

The other party who was also there waiting and we eventually left. I then sent an email to the company and Groupon (where I had purchased the tour) sharing my experience and demanding a refund. This morning I received a response from the company stating that they hoped I enjoyed the tour and to leave a review. So a review will most assuredly be left as soon as a refund is issued. In the meantime I advise anyone and everyone avoid that company at all costs. 

It should also be noted that I did read Groupon reviews before purchasing, the majority of which were positive. Justin discovered reviews which are quite the contrary on yelp.
 

My face after my experience
Photo Credit: wp clip art

Friday, October 17, 2014

Are you in the Rug Business?

The other day I was headed to class. I was feeling lazy so I decided to take the elevator. I bumped into my professor in there and we walked to class together. The following conversation transpired...

Professor: " I like your shoes and your sweater."

Me: "Thanks"

Professor: "They remind me of rugs."

Me: "Uhh... thank you?"

Professor: "Ya I am in the rug business. I get rugs from Mexico."

Me: "Oh, wow that's nice."

Professor: "Your shoes look like ???" (I can't remember the name of the print he said) "Do you know if they are that rug print?"

Me: "I'm not sure... I got them from a surfing company."

I am still not sure what to think about all of that. Anyway when I got home that day Justin asked what I was wearing and told me I had on a weird outfit. I had lost my slippers and my leggings but still had on the shirt and sweater. He claimed that he just thought it was weird that I didn't have on pants, but I don't buy that since I pretty much never have on pants at home unless they are basketball shorts.

*edit- I arrived home before Justin did, that is why I did not have on pants. 



Sunday, October 12, 2014

Big Butted Problems

Justin: My butt is too big

Me: ya right!

Justin: No really, I had to suck my butt in to squeeze into these jeans

(I turned around to check out the pants)

Me: uhh did you know you have a huge hole in the ass of those pants?

Justin: ooohhh... That's why they were on the ground then.

Big Butt Problemz.

I wrote this a couple of days ago but I feel like I should share our dinner menu with you from this evening before I post it. Today I had an oral presentation and did pretty darn well if I do say so myself. In order to celebrate Justin offered me whatever I wanted for dinner. This of course is dangerous. We went to Whole Foods and I got a salad and avoided cake which was hard. Next we went to Boise Fry Company and got three large containers of fries. Justin ate at least half if not more than half of the fries. Then he got a double stacker from Burger King and 20 chicken nuggets. He admitted that he may or may not have ordered too much food but he ate it all!

I hope it all goes to his butt so it can get more booty-licious... Except he already is pretty darn booty-licious ... Hmmm

Also I found that cat I trapped in the sticky traps the other night. It was quite bald looking. It gave me the evil eyes but did not run away. I think it was trying to show me what I did to it. Possibly trying to plot revenge. Sheesh, Cats. Anyway, I didn't have time to try to pet it since I was on my way to the presentation. 

Cat Traps

There is this cat who is black that is in our apartment complex. You may remember it. I was plotting to steal it at one point until Justin realized that it could be our neighbor's cat. Anyway for the last few months I have petted it every time I see it outside and it LOVES me.

This morning I saw it out by the pool at about 8/9 in the morning. It stared at me from outside as Justin moved a couple of boxes out while leaving the door slightly ajar. I could tell it really wanted me to pet it. It was like it was foreshadowing...

Fast forward to this evening. I arrived home from volunteering after dark. I noticed the cat waiting for me by where I park (about 300?? feet from my front door). I reached down and gave it some pets then went on my merry way. Little did I know I was being stalked. I opened the front door and paused for a moment to get the key out of the door handle. All of the sudden I heard this huge ruckus and meow as my spider trap sticky paper which lines the threshold of our apartment went about three feet in the air and attached to it was the damn cat!

It took off like a rocket. It ran clear across the complex, towards the direction which we had just come, at top speed making a terrible noise in its wake. I stared, which was all I could do. I listened as the apartment complex dogs barked as the strange cat covered in sticky traps made a scene. I shut the door momentarily and peered out the through a crack in the blinds in search of any witnesses. Anyone/everyone that saw that definitely thinks I am a cat thief, and that I stop at nothing to steal cats.
*sigh

Once I realized the coast was clear of people I went for a walk in search of my victim and discovered the sticky traps stuck together with the most gigantic clump of cat hair I have ever seen sandwiched between them. It was sitting right next to someone's big ass potted plant next to their front door. I thought about picking it up but #1 there were once dead spiders on the trap and #2 I did not want to risk getting caught with the evidence.

Alas, no cat has been found as of yet. In fact I would not be surprised if that is the last time I ever see that poor kitty. It will no longer love me but fear me... now I know what Voldemort feels like. No wonder he is so sad. 

We Need Some Rainy Days

Have you ever seen "My Neighbor Totoro,"? That movie is amazing. Today I saw this...

Photo Credit: zenshinjisyo.blog
If only I had one of those costumes, I would literally stand outside bus stops all day long on rainy days. And perhaps even stalk anyone I saw sitting with an umbrella. I feel like perhaps since the weather has been so.. unnaturally warm for this time of year that I am truly missing chilly temperatures and rainstorms.

Photo Credit: hoisthecolors (Pretty sure this is photo shopped)

For those of you who haven't had the pleasure of seeing the movie I highly recommend it. You may recognize Totoro from his cameo in Toy Story 3 however.

Photo Credit: Toy Story 3 (Pixar)

That is all I have for today since I had to endure my back to back Saturday classes, and then I actually got a flu shot for the first time since the hospital I volunteer at mandates that now. Hopefully my immune system is indestructible now.

Thursday, October 9, 2014

Los Stomach Problemos

Justin likes to go to Los Betos and get fries slathered in taco meat, cheese and who knows what else. Usually the consequences of eating this meal far outweigh the benefit but Justin doesn't see it that way. 

So tonight when I wasn't feeling particularly well Justin jumped at the opportunity to get Los Betos despite the five-ten times over the course of our relationship where I've heard "never let me eat Los Betos again." *sigh he was getting ready to tuck me in and the storm is already a brewing. So now we wait until it passes. 

In other news I learned a new word for my word arsenal: cupache. What does it mean you ask? An intense craving for a cupcake. I know not where this word came from or when It was coined but it is my new favorite word. Naturally here I would have inserted a photo of a decadent cupcake however my Internet is running terribly slow on my iPhone. So alas, I fear you will have to let your imagination run away with you as you mentally conjure an image worthy of getting a cupache over. <|:-{D      <- look it is Dumbledore. 

Wednesday, October 8, 2014

Gimli Wants My Money

Apparently Boise is having its first ever comic-con. I know this from the incessant radio bits which are on every time I get in the car. The ads discuss the fact that Jim Cummings (Winnie the Pooh voice talent) is going to be here. And I pretty much want to exit the car and play in traffic every time that horrible advertisement plays. 

Justin came home today and informed me that Gimli would be attending the comic con also. 

I decided to do some research and was saddened to find that Gimli wants loads of cash to see me. WTF Gimli I thought you learned that gold isn't everything on that epic journey you had in Middle Earth!  I have never been much of the I'm going to stalk you, give me your autograph, omg it is a celebrity type person anyway. I mean if Dumbledore and Gandalf knocked on my door in full costume then yes I would probably cry tears of joy but the likelihood of this happening is unfortunately very slim because I'm never home to answer the door, and when I am home I usually think crazy people are the ones knocking even though it's mostly UPS. So comic con Boise will have to get on without me. Sad but true. 

Tuesday, October 7, 2014

The Hidden Brown in Hash Tags

My life has been momentarily consumed with JK Rowling and her cryptic tweet ("Cry, Foe! Run amok! Fa awry! My wand won't tolerate this nonsense"). I even got me a tweeter account to play along with the guessing game. Don't worry I will be cancelling it when this has blown over because after all I am much too long winded for Twitter. Also hash tags always make me want hash browns and all I would ever be tweeting would be "hast...browns again for dinner!" Back on topic- I learned bright and early this morning that my guess from last night for the cryptic tweet, with taking the Mad Gab approach, was seriously flawed. It appears as though her sentences were an anagram. So now I have come up with this:



Newt Scamander wrote his neat tale on New York for you my fans

Obviously this is probably wrong too since I doubt that JK Rowling would use the word neat.  I must say my original guess was way more open ended and fun but hey, a girl can dream right. I haven't forgotten that Rowling once stated she was done with the Harry Potter world forever. But hope has been glittering endlessly since this whole "Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them" situation.

Anyway last night Justin and I watched "Lord of the Rings," go figure.

Also I am happy to report that Justin and I celebrated a 23 month anniversary of dating. Yes we do still celebrate the months because despite what you may think we are both 14 year old school girls who get giddy and excited about these kind of things. Since the number 23 is significant in the basketball world which Justin adores I got him a miniature Michael Jordan figurine and baseball cards from the 1990s. Also the Space Jam movie. If we ever celebrate a 23 year anniversary perhaps I can take Justin to meet the man in the flesh. This of course is highly unlikely since he will be in his 80s at that time (Jordan not Justin), however I am quite sure that happening is even less likely than Rowling writing another Harry Potter'ed plot book. I am going to go find me something to quell this mad craving for hash browns that has come out of no where. 

Here in Boise it has been in the 80s as of late but here is a photo of somewhere where it is fall. I simply had to leave this post with a photo. Photo Credit: Imgur

Monday, October 6, 2014

I have a hypothesis Did I solve that JK Rowling riddle?

JK Rowling tweeted a teaser stating: "Cry Foe! Run amok! Fa Awry"
 This was a cryptic post following that where she states she was working on a novel. 

My solution:
"Cry For One More Book For Harry"

Read it fast. Like that board game (Mad Gab?) where you read the cards with strange sentences and listen to how they sound like other phrases. 

Yes. :) it may be late and I may be exhausted but here is hoping :)