I got
my head stuck in my sweatshirt today… It was not fun. I guess the whole thing
only lasted six minutes or so but it felt like hours. I freed my arms in the
beginning. Despite how hard I was tugging I eventually had to lie in a ‘C’
shape on the floor and employ the use of my legs and feet to try to free
myself.
At
one point I actually considered going to the neighbor’s to see if he could help
me. But after the note I left on his door the other day I do not think he likes
me very much. I thought perhaps me in my bra would distract him for long enough
so that I could leave my face covered in the sweatshirt and then just run away
when he pulled my sweatshirt off. He, of course, could keep the damn death trap
as a parting gift then maybe I could return the favor when he got his head
stuck and we could be all neighborly and shit like normal people. He is a
hermit though and he would probably just die in the sweatshirt since he is
neither as flexible as I am nor as friendly as I am.
I eventually
realized that even if he answered the door and pulled off my sweatshirt there
was still a problem. Once I was freed I could either run away from my
apartment and show my tatas to god only knows how many people, or run into my
apartment. If I ran back into my apartment he would probably realize it was me
and I would not be as inconspicuous as I had intended. It would pretty much be
the equivalent of opening a terrible Christmas present if this chick in a bra
showed up at your doorstep and you pulled her head out of its trap just to find
that she is the asshole that draws pictures of Chewbacca and pastes them to
your door.
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